So begins a prayer in the wilderness...

My blog started as a 'letter to home' during my first 3 months living/working in a Brazilian orphanage. It was written to an audience of close friends and family so they could follow my adventures and my experiences from afar.

The reality of all blogs is that no one (but your mother and best friend) reads them. This blog has existed in a corner of the internet - untouched, unread - since I stepped on the plane to leave Brazil after my first trip over 3 years ago.

Life has continued undocumented.

Life is breakups, melt downs, bouts of deep depression, new jobs, homes, friends, new relationships, and most notably a true faith - an active faith, a faith is God's control and my salvation and His plan - a decision to trust.

This blog began as a convenient 'letter home' for a select audience - but tonight I will resurrect it for a very different reason. Tonight, I accept the essential nature of blogs - they are hidden in the enomrity of internet, and they are painfully personal indulgences.

Tonight this blog become my letter to myself - I suppose it is called a journal.

So why am 'blogging' a journal that I hope and expect no one to read? The reasons are practical - I don't like writing long-hand, and I like that this blog can be archived outside a 100 page journal or my dying laptop.

Duct Tape Duck 

If you are reading this... than I wanted you to know the nature of what is about to unfold over the next several days/weeks/months. If you are reading this, what-comes-next was not written for you - but read it if you please. Just as prayers spoken gently with eyes-closed in the woods are not for the passing hikers, this blog is written to God and myself but I do not care if it is overheard.

After these next sentences I will switch to writing for an audience of two - God and myself (expect the pronouns I and You accordingly).  After this I will begin creating a place for myself to explore the horrible practice of a fearless moral inventory... a place to share with you, God, my prayers, fears, and shit....a place for me to speak to myself past, present, and future - like the Doctor dropping notes behind/ahead of himself in the timeline.

Jesus spoke to God away from all others in the wilderness. So, in that spirit, I write to you, God, in the wilderness of the internet.

So be it.